The Great Experiment

I've been following a certain path all my life.

I was a computer geek in high school; I majored in computer science in college; I went on to a tech support job after I graduated. That led to technical specialist jobs, then to system administration. It was the same natural progression that many technically-minded people take these days. As long as I didn't get a lobotomy along the way, it wasn't too hard to take opportunities as they came up every now and then.

And it wasn't difficult to see down the road, either. More complex system management jobs, more authority. More reponsibility. More pay. Less free time, even less of a social and personal life. I could see myself in five years with an income well into six figures (keep in mind that everything in Silicon Valley is inflated, including salaries) and carrying so many pagers that I'd need one of those bandolier straps like Chewbacca wears. My line of work can pay extremely well, but it involves solving other peoples' problems and devoting myself to their schedules, day or night.

It took me a long time to realize that this wasn't what I wanted out of life.

It took even longer for me to figure out what I did want. I finally decided that a house was at the top of my list, since I've been living in an apartment for the past eight years and I've always craved more space to spread out in. But if I was seriously thinking of buying a house in Silicon Valley, where a three-bedroom ranch-style home on a small lot goes for half a million dollars, maybe I needed that lobotomy after all.

My job was my life, as it also was with most of my friends in the area, so I rarely got to see any of them. So, as I was unable to spend time with friends, and as it didn't make sense to really settle down in a house... where was my life going, anyway? What kind of a life is it where days and weekends blend together into one vague mishmash of project schedules, demarcated by occasional trips to the computer store? Now I'm almost thirty years old, and all I have to show for it are a pile of computer toys and video games. Is there any reason to believe that my life will be any more fulfilling ten years down the road?

On the other hand, how responsible is it to walk away from a good career? How much sense does it make to base my future on one dream?

Maybe it makes all the sense in the world.

It's time to find out.

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